Taking a moment to be serious here, which will happen from time to time, I'm going to share and expand on the great advice my mother gave me which I have never forgotten.
As an educator of the 'tween' group, I often go back and remember my time as a terribly awkward, sometimes abrasive, and very bookish early adolescent. I remember what it was like to be hormonal, sensitive, boy-crazy and confused. A lot. I had terrible self-esteem. We're talking really, really, really low.
In one of my tearful rants to my mother about why the boy I liked at the time didn't like me back, she told me that being continually obsessed with one person and one person only is not good for you. "You need to have other things in your life that make you happy other than men," she said.
So, as I watch my tween female students obsess over Twilight, both the books and the movies, I am not afraid to voice my disapproval of the series. They ask me time and time again why I don't like the books and all I can say is 'I think Edward is a bad boyfriend'. I sometimes felt like I was alone in my severe dislike for him (until recently, see the link).
There are many reasons I don't like the Twilight series, and they are all summarized in the idealized asshat that is Edward Cullen. Bella Swan, who is supposed to be the heroine of the story, shows that she really thinks she is nothing if she does not have the love of a man at every single moment. She is certainly not an independent woman by any means.
And then there's what happens after New Moon. I haven't read the books myself, but I know from Wikipedia (God bless you, Wikipedia) that Bella marries and then becomes pregnant at a terribly young age. Marriage and babies while still a teenager? I do not know if this is a good idea at all. I mean, sure, maybe Stephanie Meyer thought it was a good idea at first, for the use of her plot and all, but do we really want a book that deals with teenage pregnancy to be read by a bunch of teenage girls? Maybe. It depends on the context. But in this context, teen pregnancy is romanticized, as is a boyfriend who really isn't that wonderful a boyfriend at all. So, based on that, I am going to say that it is NOT okay.
Does Bella ever think about college? Does she ever talk about things she loves other than Edward? Does she have hopes and dreams for her career or her future? Does she have a night with her girlfriends where they all sit around and drink wine while gossiping and laughing? Her circumstances may be abnormal, but that doesn't excuse the fact that I see both Edward and Bella (and most of the characters in the Twilight books) as very flat characters that I find difficult to care about and connect with.
Bella's mother obviously never told her what my mother told me. And, by no means to I think of myself as being terrific at relationships (I am not) and at times in my past I did not stick up for myself when even though I should have. I can't change the past, but I can change how I behave in the future.
It's not my place to tell Andrea, Jessica, Abby, Katie and Molly about how I find Edward Cullen to be boderline abusive and totally dreadful. Or maybe it is. Sometimes I don't think they'll get it even if I do. Maybe it's something you learn from experience.
No comments:
Post a Comment