2009: The Year of Growing, YouTube and Eating Alone

My my, it's finally come to an end.

2009 was quite the year, and, for the first time, it was a year that felt like it actually lasted a year. So much happened between January and now and it's hard to really put them all into words.

I think one of the greatest things is the fact that I am in a much better place at the end of the year than I was at the beginning of the year. In January I was on the verge of turning 22, I was surrounding myself with people who were bad for my emotional well-being (and that's all I'm going to say on that subject). I wasn't taking very good care of myself, I had a lot of anxiety. I didn't sleep much and I ate sporadically. I drank a lot. Three nights a week minimum, which is kind of sad. I had finished a terrible semester and had resolved to do better in school. I was pretty unsure of what I wanted to do right after school. I knew I wanted to be a teacher but I wasn't quite sure of how to go about it. I had lots of fun senior year, but it was a true challenge in a lot of ways. I ended my tenure at the student newspaper I loved exhausted, bitter and ready for a change.

When May rolled around, I was ecstatic for graduation. I do not care what others say, I thought graduation was a great day. I was truly proud of myself because I got myself my double-major all on my own. I worked really hard (and I played really hard, too). I spent a lot of the last few weeks of senior week being optimistic about life and being continually grateful for all my friends that made my college experience so memorable.

So now I look at my life at the end of 2009 and how it's very different. For one, I no longer live with four other girls my own age, but instead family members. I get up at 6:20 every week day and go into work. I have to pay cell phone bills, I had to buy health insurance, I had to take my car into the shop numerous times and pay for the repairs myself. That was a huge change. I go to staff meetings. I've watched friends get married, I've watched friends have babies and go through just as many, if not more, changes as me.

Many of my friends moved away, though some did stay. I do not go out three nights a week. Instead, it's usually once a week, maybe twice. I get tired at 10:30. I've become a pro at entertaining myself. I've begun to watch channels on YouTube, I watch prime time TV for the first time in years, I go to the movies by myself. I go out to eat alone, too. I read a lot. I write...hell, I wrote a whole novel in 2009! That's something to be proud of.

Minus the year I went to college, this year has been the biggest year of change in my life, both externally and internally. I picked myself up by my bootstraps and took care of myself before anyone else and that was important for me to do. I graduated with the best grades I ever had. I picked out a lot of weeds, and kept many of the flowers.

And those beautiful, wild, and all around glorious flowers were the friends that stuck with me when I was pretty irritable/emo/frustrated/lost. I've taken my loneliness and have turned it into good things. I'm okay with where I am in my life and where I'm going and to say that at age 22 is pretty awesome.

Every day I get to get up, and that's the part I hate the most, the getting up, mostly because I can never seem to get enough sleep. Once that's over with, I truly enjoy almost every day of my life. I have 40 little "Chostskys" who I love, or at least tolerate, and they have taught me a lot, too. Plus, they always make me smile when I'm having a bad day.

So, I raise my glass to toast to 2009, a year that was a much needed challenge. It's come and gone, and now there's a lot to look forward to. Bring on 2010. Happy New Year, readers!

10 things I like now (December)

This store

Oh, Urban Outfitters. You will drive me into debt one day.

This actor

I know it's silly, but for some reason I find Cory Montieth of 'Glee' to be totally dreamy in a high-school-fan-girl kind of way.

This movie

Weeks after seeing "The Blind Side," I'm still thinking about it. It was a truly uplifting film and a very good sports movie!

This city

Denver, I miss you. Don't worry, I'm coming home soon.

This man

Colin Firth: Dreamy and Darcy (twice!)

This drink

I really like Great Lakes Christmas Ale, especially around the holidays. Don't tell New Belgium.

These lines from this movie


"I realize that when I met you at the turkey curry buffet, I was unforgivably rude, and wearing a reindeer jumper."

"I like you...just as you are."

"Resolution #1: uggg - will obviously lose 20 lbs. #2: always put last night's panties in the laundry basket. Equally important: will find nice sensible boyfriend and stop forming romantic attachments to any of the following: alcoholics, workoholics, sexaholics, commitment-phobics, peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits, or perverts. Will especially stop fantasizing about a particular person who embodies all these things."

"I'm sorry? Outside? Should I bring my dueling pistols or my sword?"

This book

There are many, many stories written about WWII and the Nazi occupation, but "The Book Thief" is a breath of fresh air. With a twist on the setting, the characters, and the style, this thick YA novel is a page turner and truly satisfying in so many ways. It is a real artistic and literary achievement!

This TV show

"The Big Bang Theory" is funny and not campy at all. They don't follow a lot of normal sitcom conventions either and the characters are truly dynamic and funny. I LOVE Jim Parson as Sheldon, he is hilarious. Plus, these guys make me feel so less nerdy.

This CD

I know I mentioned Pixie Lott once before in this blog, but now my affinity for her has grown. Since downloading her album "Turn It Up" I have been listening to the whole thing (and genuinely enjoying it) on repeat. She reminds a little of Natasha Bedingfield, only she can sing better, and she's quirky and conventional, and just all around good pop music.


That's all for December! This feature will be back in January!

more Christmas cheer

Today my phone broke.

I was annoyed, then sort of excited because I thought....oh! Maybe this means I can get a whole new phone that's much better and much more high tech. I went to the Verizon store, after waiting in a horrendous line at the bank, only to wait in another horrendous line and then meet up with a saleswoman who had more 'tude than she should have and it turns out that I can't get a new phone until February. So, for now, I'm going to have to make due with my mom's ghettofabulous phone when it gets here on Wednesday.

I felt like a total grump. I mean, 'tis the season, right? I was tired and angry and kind of cranky and as much as I love my little Chotskys, I need a break from them. So when I got home, I couldn't help but watch some clips of my favorite Christmas moments to make me feel less like Ebenezer Scrooge and more like the kids who got on board the polar express. Enjoy! And Merry Christmas!

A Saturnallian Miracle!

The Holiday Armadillo

This One Goes Out to the Prime Minister

Love Actually - MyVideo

Quotable Kids #3

Last week, my grandmother had knee surgery and I have been subbing in the library for her. So now, my edition of Quotable Kids has expanded from grades 5-8 to include all grades.




(Jobie is in the 2nd grade)
Me: Oh! I like this book about presidents
Jobie: Me too, I like presidents a lot
Me: Do you want to be president someday?
Jobie: No, I don't want to get shot at


Me: Evan, what are you doing with the dictionary?
Evan: Looking up the word 'douchebag'. Jeff called me that and I don't know what it means.


Me: Courtney, you drew a tower for yourself and a tower for your boyfriend?
Courtney: Well yea, we can't share a tower 'til we get married


Me: Now, when you draw your castles, you cannot have any weapons
Stephen: Well, I guess I have to erase my torture chamber


Me: You learn a lot of different things in college
Abby: Did you learn how to play beer pong in college?


Stephen: I'm on Team Jacob since that Edward guy looks like he doesn't wash his hair.


(while on playground duty, I watched the 4th and 5th grade boys play basketball. Mitch blocked Alex's shot) Mitch: Watch out. I'm like the next Jason Love."


Stephen: If I ever get a therapist, I'll tell her how nice you were to me.


Me: So because you got all your AR points this month, if you want to bring in a snack and a drink to have while we watch Harry Potter, that's okay
Joseph: Like pop?
Me: Yes, of course
Mitch: What about beer?
Me: No, Mitch. No one is this classroom is allowed to drink beer
Mitch: You are! You drink beer! Jeff told me you do!
Me: I don't drink it here!
Mitch: So what do you drink out of that thermos then?

People I genuinely enjoy following on twitter

Twitter is awesome. I'm tired of trying to hate it. I really like it for multiple reasons, and one of those reasons is how I am able to get lots of news that I'm interested in right at my fingertips. It's almost like a filter. And now that you can have lists, I use this more than anything.

Even though Twitter is always changing, this does not always mean that everyone I follow is always interesting. Sometimes the people I follow rarely tweet (that means you, J.K. Rowling! Just tweet every now and then and make me a happy girl!) or tweet way too much (that would be you, John Mayer).

So here's a nice break down of people I find to be truly enjoyable to follow on Twitter.

@cnnbreaking--Breaking news at your fingertips. Thanks to them, I found out about Balloon Boy.

@EWMichaelSlezak--I follow him for my American Idol and reality TV news, but sometimes he tweets about other things at EW.

@xavierbuzztap--whoever is doing this should be rewarded. This feed is the reason that I am able to follow Xavier sports so closely

@tomfelton--Tom tweets a decent amount. It's never overbearing, yet he never forgets about his followers. He updates with stuff that is truly interesting and sometimes answers fan questions via his Twitter. And every now and then he teases us with updates from the set!

@FakeAPStyleBook--absolutely. hilarious.

@shitmydadsays--also hilarious

@digg_2000--anything that's digged more that 2,000 times is put on this feed. It introduces me to the truly interesting and truly bizarre things floating around on the Internet.

@mental_floss--random and informative, I love this magazine and website to begin with and their feed has tiny insights and trivia on it, as well as links to articles

@frankenteen--Otherwise known as Cory Montieth, otherwise known as Finn on 'Glee' and his feed is not only informative, but also entertaining

@mtvmoviesblog--updates of the movie blog on MTV which I truly enjoy and find informative. On a good day, I read five stories from their feed.

@joshgroban--it's really him! He updates with thoughtful things, funny/inappropriate links and never overloads my feed. I really get a feel for Groban's personality via his Twitter.

p.s. you can follow me on Twitter!

Secret Shame #2: (sometimes terrible) British Pop music

I cannot deny that I have a love for a catchy song with a good beat every now and then, but sometimes I find American pop music to be dull and repetitive and existing of either artists that have been around forever or typical one-hit wonders.

It's just not enough variety for me, which is why I have recently taken a liking to listening to BBC Radio1.

Keeping with my general fondness for all things British, I find that I really like their pop music. It's super catchy, uses lots of synthesizers, but I've noticed that all these singers (or at least the majority of them) can actually sing. The list of American pop stars that CAN'T actually sing grows longer every single day (sorry, Miley Cyrus, you're definitely on there).

The Saturdays


I'm shamefully enjoying select songs from their sophomore album (which is not out in the U.S. so don't ask me how I got it) "Wordshaker." Now, if that's not the greatest word for a guy who spews lies and tries to take back things he has said, then I do not know what it. This word better enter the American vernacular. I'm going to make it happen...which means it probably won't.

"Ego" and "Wordshaker" are the best tracks and they make me want to dance/run so that's always good. I don't necessarily know if The Saturdays would make a splash in the U.S. if they decided to come to this side of the pond. Sometimes I think girl groups with actual talent have gone by the wayside here, but you never know. They should at least try.

Cheryl Cole


Truth be told, I did not know who she was but I kept seeing her name pop up on the BBC entertainment website so I Googeled her. She is from the all girl group "Girls Aloud" and is now embarking on a solo career and she's married to a famous footballer. So, essentially she's Posh Spice, er, Victoria Beckham. Whatever.

I looked her up on YouTube and I was like, 'meh, it's alright' but suddenly I have 'Fight for This Love' stuck in my head all the time. Her new single '3 Words' with Will.I.Am is decent and catchy as well. I get excited when it comes on my BBC radio. So lame.

Pixie Lott

To give a quick description of Ms. Lott that cuts right to the chase is "girl can sing". Holy moly. I really like her style and just the sheer sound of her voice. For some reason there is a hint of something in there that reminds me of Kelly Clarkson. Anyways, be sure to check out "Cry Me Out" and "Mama Do" on YouTube. Those two tracks are by far her best. "Cry Me Out," which really shows off her vocals, is the kind of song I would sing in the shower or in the car at the top of my lungs when I'm sure that no one can hear me.

Pixie's look and her music videos seem to be void of any real personality, though there are hints of it in "Cry Me Out." She sometimes wears outfits that are like the awkward little siblings to the wardrobe of Lady Gaga, so something tells me that we aren't getting the full picture of Pixie's real image.

Tooting My Own Horn: Edition 1

You know, I work hard, so I deserve to pat myself on the back every now and then.

Well, recently I completed NaNoWriMo. For those of you unfamiliar with this, NaNoWriMo=National Novel Writing Month. It's a challenge to see if you can write a whole novel in 30 days. The novel must have a beginning, a middle, and an end, and must be 50,000 words long.

So, I am pleased to say that I completed NaNoWriMo! I wrote a YA novel titled '24 Days with Benjamin Moore'. It is 50,131 words long and about 81 single spaced pages on the word processor. It was exhausting, the final product is terrible, yet I am so proud of myself I could burst.

The thing that I loved about NaNoWriMo was that we were not allowed to go back and edit our stuff. We just had to keep writing. It was very liberating and I found the writing process to be much easier this way. I looked forward to sitting down every day to write and I love my story.

Now tomorrow marks my one week away from the novel. I told myself I would need some space after finishing it, but soon I plan on returning to it and going over the painful process of editing it. This is the part I was sort of dreading when I started the novel, but now I'm looking forward to it even more. I know that it needs edits and I'm excited for the edits because it will make the book even better. And that's my goal, to make it better, to make it the best I possibly can.

In my one week off from writing, I've grown to really miss it. I am looking forward to sitting down and trolling through it and, eventually, writing something else (or continuing from the stories I have already started). I encourage all writers to do this, whether its for fun or for reals, it was a truly rewarding experience.

Alright, that's enough of inflating my own ego for the day. :)

12 Things I Love About CHRISTMAS!

Holy Red Ryder BB guns, it's officially the Christmas season.

I effing love Christmas. I can't really explain why this is my favorite holiday. I think it has to do with having awesome Christmases as a kid and how I find the season to be uplifting and romantic (though it's easy to make it materialistic). Here are my 12 things that I love about Christmas.

"Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" by Frank Sinatra

I love this Christmas Carol and ol' blue eyes' version is probably the one Christmas carol that could bring a tear to my eye. His voice is perfect for this song and it reminds me of Christmas at my house in Colorado. I truly love it!

Poinsettias

For some reason, I just find something romantic about flowers that only bloom in December. I love the rich red color of the plant and how they decorate homes and churches during the holiday season. I also am, of course, a sucker for the story of the poinsetta's origin, though it may not be the most factual story of all time. Legend has it that a little girl in Mexico didn't have money for a birthday gift for Jesus. An angel came to her and told her to gather weeds and they grew into beautiful poinsettia blossoms once layed on the floor of the girl's tiny local church.

A Muppet Christmas Carol


The Muppets crack me up. They totally appeal to my sense of humor. This scene ("we are Marley and Marley...wooooahaaahahah!) cracks me up every time I see it. In this movie, which I make a point to watch every Christmas, the Muppets are funny, but also touching. It's a great adaptation of a story that has been adapted many, many times.

"The Gift of the Magi" by O. Henry

Ever remember your first intial reaction to reading a classic story? When I picked up this tiny book, having no idea what the story was, I didn't expect my reaction to be so raw. Well, to say the least, I was moved. I remember crying very silent tears when I read the ending. It seems that this is really what romantic love and Christmas are really all about.

A Christmas Story

This goes without explanation, I think.

A Charlie Brown Christmas

I think this image, of Charlie Brown and his tree, is one of the most iconic Christmas pop-culture images ever. But it's what happens after this that makes this little Christmas special watchable again and again.

My house in Colorado

For the years we do spend Christmas in Colorado, my parents home (which used to be mine, I guess) is so beautifully decorated. My mom puts up a little village that spreads thoughout the house. Our Christmas tree, as you can see, is heavily decorated, but beautiful nonetheless. Garland and lights hang from our stair banisters and throughout the house there are classic Christmas trinkets and humorous and touching Christmas books. We even have a giant nutcracker!

"The Polar Express"

When I was little, I made my Dad read me this story over and over again every Christmas season. Now when I see the book at school I marvel over the beautiful illustrations and the sense of imagination it evokes in all the students at my school.

"Love Actually"

This best part of this movie is A) Hugh Grant singing and dancing B) the "to me, you are perfect...." signs C) the closing monologue D) Bill Nighy's ridiculousness

The answer is: E) All of the above!

"Noel" by Josh Groban

This is a fantastic Christmas album. It is a mix of super traditional, timeless, and modern and Groban's voice is perfect for such carols as 'O Come All Ye Faithful' and 'What Child Is This?'. But the tracks that are truly standouts are "The Little Drummer Boy" and "It Came Upon A Midnight Clear", the later being one that is rarely done and rarely done well. It's not Christmas if I haven't listened to this album over and over again.

Christmas cookies

To be honest, I've never met a cookie I didn't like.

ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas

Lots of traditional holiday programming, a few new things that I can stomach just because it's Christmas, and, of course, Harry Potter weekend!

the best advice my mother ever gave me

Taking a moment to be serious here, which will happen from time to time, I'm going to share and expand on the great advice my mother gave me which I have never forgotten.

As an educator of the 'tween' group, I often go back and remember my time as a terribly awkward, sometimes abrasive, and very bookish early adolescent. I remember what it was like to be hormonal, sensitive, boy-crazy and confused. A lot. I had terrible self-esteem. We're talking really, really, really low.

In one of my tearful rants to my mother about why the boy I liked at the time didn't like me back, she told me that being continually obsessed with one person and one person only is not good for you. "You need to have other things in your life that make you happy other than men," she said.

So, as I watch my tween female students obsess over Twilight, both the books and the movies, I am not afraid to voice my disapproval of the series. They ask me time and time again why I don't like the books and all I can say is 'I think Edward is a bad boyfriend'. I sometimes felt like I was alone in my severe dislike for him (until recently, see the link).

There are many reasons I don't like the Twilight series, and they are all summarized in the idealized asshat that is Edward Cullen. Bella Swan, who is supposed to be the heroine of the story, shows that she really thinks she is nothing if she does not have the love of a man at every single moment. She is certainly not an independent woman by any means.

And then there's what happens after New Moon. I haven't read the books myself, but I know from Wikipedia (God bless you, Wikipedia) that Bella marries and then becomes pregnant at a terribly young age. Marriage and babies while still a teenager? I do not know if this is a good idea at all. I mean, sure, maybe Stephanie Meyer thought it was a good idea at first, for the use of her plot and all, but do we really want a book that deals with teenage pregnancy to be read by a bunch of teenage girls? Maybe. It depends on the context. But in this context, teen pregnancy is romanticized, as is a boyfriend who really isn't that wonderful a boyfriend at all. So, based on that, I am going to say that it is NOT okay.

Does Bella ever think about college? Does she ever talk about things she loves other than Edward? Does she have hopes and dreams for her career or her future? Does she have a night with her girlfriends where they all sit around and drink wine while gossiping and laughing? Her circumstances may be abnormal, but that doesn't excuse the fact that I see both Edward and Bella (and most of the characters in the Twilight books) as very flat characters that I find difficult to care about and connect with.

Bella's mother obviously never told her what my mother told me. And, by no means to I think of myself as being terrific at relationships (I am not) and at times in my past I did not stick up for myself when even though I should have. I can't change the past, but I can change how I behave in the future.

It's not my place to tell Andrea, Jessica, Abby, Katie and Molly about how I find Edward Cullen to be boderline abusive and totally dreadful. Or maybe it is. Sometimes I don't think they'll get it even if I do. Maybe it's something you learn from experience.